Function Of Life

Diary Of My Dreams

For The Strange Things We Never Forget

It was one of those strange dreams that left you with an otherwordly aftertaste of love, but you couldn't even remember them exactly. Perhaps you wouldn't even want to. These things leave you sleep walking for the rest of the day. The complete devotion you could only feel at the times like these. Things you remember just before you go to sleep in another night. A girl said "enjoy" for no reason at all. I drove past a woman who looked just like the one in my dreams. She was smiling.  Reminded me of the feeling of dreams, not the kind you'd notice when you'd been awake though. These things always tend to slip away.

I've forgotten everything
We ever tried
But if ya come back tonight
Careful what you bring
The sky's unwinding here
Twisted like a busted spring.

-Walkabouts

posted by: orlandomarie at 21:20 | link | comments |

Zombies

We we back at our school, minding our business when these huge white trucks drive by. We immediately realize it's the terrorists with their bombs. One of those Irish ones. We try to get as far away from the bombs, but decide it would be better if we'd just make a run for it. There had to be about 50 of us, running out through some window in the back yard. The terrorists start running after us, shooting all around. I dodge behing a tree and kick one of them in the face while he's reloading, I shoot a couple and run my way to the streets, where it turns out they were actually zombies.
Then I go to the store to buy some lottery tickets, but there's this guy hoggin the line, wanting to buy a lottery ticket, saying he doesn't have any money.

posted by: orlandomarie at 09:41 | link | comments |

Pen Springs

These two business chicks hired me to be a rehersal motivational manager. The staff was a bit nervous (probably terrified out of their asses) about the real thing so they asked me, but the deal was none of the employes knew I was fake. They thought if I could show them motivational managers could be cheery guys, someday they'd come to love them. It's just usual business practice these days. So what I did was get dressed as Santa Claus and started putting a bunch of pen springs in my mouth. And they just sat there with blank expressions on their face. What a bunch of naïve folks, I thought to myself. And I was having the fun of my life. Getting all that stuff out was a bit hard, with steel hooked inside my mouth and all and I couldn't get all of them because they were stuck in between my front teeth, so I decided to do a Bugs Bunny impression. You know, because of the whiskers. Afterwards we'd lie in the bed with these two, with a sort of vertical view, they didn't look too bad that way.

We also went to the sea a bit before this, late at night and it looked like a shallow lake. Stinked as well. So out of nowhere come these crabs that were like two of them attached at the ass or head, I can't tell. They had these four claws and they walked on them like some aliens from the War Of The Worlds. "What the fuck is that?" I cry off the top of my lungs. "It's just the crabs, stupid". Then I remember they really were just ordinary crabs, I just couldn't remember since the last time I was at sea, I just saw one and that was the first time I was ever at sea as well. There were a whole shitload of them, you could barely walk amongst them like some crab king. Apparently they came to land for food and accasionalhy someone would try to chew off your shoe, but other than that, it was pretty awesome.

posted by: orlandomarie at 17:42 | link | comments |